Monday, November 24, 2008

I AM Alive! :)

Yes, I have not written in two months. Why? I felt like I had nothing to talk about. When I got home from school, I went through many tests and I was diagnosed with depression. I was scared to talk about it for awhile. I couldn't get out of bed, I felt completely worthless, I thought the world would be better off without me, I was scared to go outside, and I just didn't feel like me anymore. It was the most frustrating thing I have ever gone through. I got so bad that my mom had to carry me to the car to get me to go to the doctor. I have now been on anti-depressants for two months and I have been going to counseling and I am glad to say that I am doing GREAT. I am back to being Heather again. I was dancing in the kitchen the other day and my sister just giggled and said, "You're back." I have had so much support from my family and friends during this time and I am so blessed.

My mom has also had some health scares during this time. They thought she had breast cancer and cervical cancer. But we found out she has Stage 0 breast cancer, which means cancer could develop so we just have to watch her and they removed a cancerous part from her cervix so she is fine! It was very stressful for awhile but now she is healthy.

We are still looking for jobs...both me and my mom. It is horrible. There are NO jobs in Olympia...if you want to know. Especially with the hiring freeze on all state jobs, which is the majority of full-time jobs that are here! But we are still working on it and we are still staying positive.

I have never been so close to my mom and sister as I have become during these last few months. We have learned that we have each other and that is what is most important. We have learned to trust and have faith that everything will work out. Yes, I sometimes still get lonely because I miss having friends around, but overall...I can say that I am happy and incredibly blessed and I am so lucky for all that I have.


Aubrey said...

I love you! Don't forget.

Laura McGee said...

Heather its good to hear from you. If you ever want to talk about the depression let me know. I have suffered from depression my entire life, but it wasn't until i misscarried back in 2006 that i realized how bad things were and with the support and love of logan i was able to seek counceling and be put on medication to help. i hardly tell anyone and i am proud of you for posting it on your blog, you are brave and strong and a beautiful daughter of God. I will keep an eye out for jobs for you and your mom.. i dont know of anything but still never could hurt right?
hang in there and enjoy the time with your mom and sister.
love you

Stephanie said...

I'm so glad that we were able to hang out during Thanksgiving vaction. I'm coming home on Saturday!!